DEALING WITH LANDMINES

"Forgiveness is rediscovering the shining path of peace that... you thought others took away..."

~Dodinsky ~

Our days are full of land-mines- all kinds of things that set us off, twist our moods, and sour our good time. And once we've been tripped, it's hard to bounce back. We reel from the impact, inconsequential though it may ultimately be.
     It's a process to restore ourselves to well-being. It would be nice if we could make the decision to let go and then just let go. But instead, we have to consider what triggered us and why; acknowledge human error and limitation on every front; engage forgiveness and compassion where necessary, and then turn our attention back to the moment and the business at hand.

We live in a world of error and miscalculation so forgiveness is a large part of our daily fare. 

HONORING THE PROCESS

"Time takes time"
~ Ringo Starr ~

We are so anxious to get to the other side of things- especially unpleasant things- that we rush them and force them along instead of allowing for the natural process of time and grace. We impatiently insist on our own timing- on what coordinates with our schedule and all of the things that we have to do. We can't be bothered, and we strongly resist being held back.
     And yet, all of our resistance changes nothing, so we would do far better to accept things as they are, and let the process play out as it will.

I make room in my life for the natural process of time.

 

ABANDONING THE BEST MADE PLANS

"He is making you more flexible, and for this, be thankful."

~ Terri Guillemets ~

It's infrequent at best that things play out as we hope they will. Our plans can take us only so far, and then we have to rely on instinct and guidance. We have to surrender our agendas to the reality of what is. This is a humbling business. It seems easier to be insistent. It seems easier to muscle our way through to the other side. But it's not.
     What's easiest is to admit the truth as it presents itself, admit we might have been wrong about it, and appreciate the beauty of things exactly as they are.

I surrender to the plan beyond my plan and trust the bigger picture.

TRAVELING THE ROAD

"No matter how one may think himself accomplished, when he sets out to learn a new language, science, or the bicycle, he has entered a new realm as truly as if he were a child newly born into the world."

~ Frances Willard ~

 

We learn as we go- that's just the way things happen. Try as we might to be fully prepared and well-educated in advance, it is only experience that gives us the tools and strategies that we need the most.    

     We have to show up for new adventures, as prepared as we can be, but open to whatever may come. The adventure itself will guide us, if we let it, and continue to instruct us and lead us as we make our way.

The journey of life stretches before me like a road in the distance. I have to keep on driving in order to see what comes next.

THE NEED FOR DISCUSSION

"Communication- the human connection - is the key to personal and career success."

~ Paul J. Meyer ~

Getting a human being on the phone these days is an extreme challenge, and often, an impossibility. I love my email and text communication as well as the next guy, but there are times and situations when we need to have an actual conversation. Certain intricacies, delicacies, and details require verbal communication, and without it we are handicapped. In such cases, we need the back and forth, the discussion option- two human beings working together to work something out.
     I am not a huge fan of talking on the phone, but there are times when it is necessary, helpful, and good.

In spite of texts and emails and instant communication, I appreciate the need for occasional phone conversations.

MANIPULATIVE INQUIRY

"Once you start asking questions, innocence is gone."

~ Mary Astor ~

Sometimes we ask a question and pretend to be innocent about it, but we actually have an agenda. We want our question to lead somewhere, to develop into something in particular, to get the person we're asking to realize something, or behave a certain way.
     Let's be honest about this and not fool ourselves into thinking that we're less manipulative than we are.

I ask questions free from motive or agenda, and simply because I want to know.

PROCEEDING WITH CARE

"To pay attention, this is our endless and proper work."

~ Mary Oliver ~

 

Making assumptions, being too quick to act, and not paying attention are three behaviors that can, and will, get us in trouble. We make errors this way that end up taking us more time in the long run. It's a kind of carelessness really. So many of our little daily dramas and frustrations could be avoided or ameliorated if we would just slow down and take our time from the get-go.

 

I take care as I go about doing things, and this saves me a world of angst down the road.