CATASTROPHIC THINKING

     Often, we seek a big external fix when all that's actually needed is a small internal adjustment. Nine times out of ten, a shift in attitudinal approach will cure what ails us. We become frantic with our figuring and planning, and all the things that have to change immediately, and what it will all mean, and how it will work, or not work...
     But if we just change the angle of our perspective slightly, and restore ourselves to gratitude and faith, we may discover that nothing is broken after all, and that nothing actually needs fixing. Our problem is mysteriously resolved, and all we had to do to get there was to look at things a little differently. Both hardship and pleasure, in the end, are fundamentally a matter of perspective.

Before I panic and think I have to change everything in my life to feel ok, I get quiet and become willing to change my perspective on things just the way they are.

WEEDING

     Weeding around vegetables and flowers is an ongoing summer chore, and the tenacity and come-back-ability of certain weeds is at once both annoying and impressive. Certain life issues are much like that. They come up and we deal with them and feel satisfied that they are handled and long-gone, and then they come up again, and again. They are learned-coping behaviors, rooted deep within us from years of use. Even when we dig them up and extract them with care, they grow back.
     The only thing for it is maintenence. Our lives, like our gardens, require consistent and regular weeding or they will become a jungle of dysfunction.

I recognize my "stuff" as it pops up over and over, and I pull it from the roots like weeds.

TIRED AS A COVER-STORY

     We use "tired" as an excuse for anything and everything. We are too tired to participate, to exercise, to eat well, to dress well, to communicate, to be pleasant... What makes us so tired? Is it a cover story for being dis-interested? Bored? Afraid? Perhaps it is the simple result of our lively spirit being over-taxed. It wants to be playful and delight in life, and instead it feels oppressed with the weight of daily obligations and requirements and bills. Tired is heavy, and burdensome. It is trudging and old.
     Perhaps, if we feel tired a great deal, it is a message for us. Perhaps we need to re-evaluate the way we spend our time, the way we exert our energy, and the way we pour our vitality out into the world. Maybe we are wasteful about it. Maybe we are not honoring our heart. Maybe we are so duty bound that we are missing the calling of our small joys.
     Enthusiasm is never tired. It is ever-creative, sprightly, bright-eyed, and fully alive. If we cannot maintain enthusiasm, perhaps we need to make some changes in the way we live. It's a hard thing to look at. The changes that call us might require leaps of faith and abundant courage. We might have to plunge into the unknown. What we have is predictable, even if it's exhausting. To change takes so much effort, that it seems easier somehow to just keep on as we are and be "tired."  But if we're honest, we know that in the end, staying stuck does not, and cannot, and will not ever, have the power to satisfy us.

If I'm always tired, I am willing to do some soul searching to discover what my tired is all about, and honestly consider the changes I need to make to restore vitality to my life.

 

UNEXPECTED BEAUTY

     Certain weeds have pretty flowers. They are wild and uncultured. They grow by the roadside and in the woods, and by the edge of fields. They pop up and bloom with stickers and thorns. They remind me that beauty is not limited to the mainstream of life. It is not limited by anything. It is sometimes restless and sometimes poised, but regardless of the moment and the view, it is always fresh and authentic- true to itself. Beauty is unapologetic and innocent. It doesn't know it's beautiful. It simply is what it is, and as such, it takes our breath away.

I recognize and experience beauty in the most unlikely of places. It never ceases to surprise and delight me.

GREAT DAYS

     Any day can be a great day. It doesn't matter if it's Monday or Friday, raining or clear, empty of activity or full of errands. What makes the day good or bad is the way we approach it. If we are happy to go along and get along, then we can have one great day after another. If, on the other hand, we insist that things be a particular way and just to our liking, and that it matters how people behave and what we have to do for work and the state of the weather; if conditions have to be perfect according to our belief system and world view before we can consider the day a success, then we will likely have bad days instead of good ones, and plenty of them.
     It's important to remember that we have the power to change our mind about things at any time, and as often as we please. Nothing makes the day lousy but the way we sell it to ourselves- as pain and suffering, or grand adventure. Let's make the decision to choose adventure, and have one great day after another like pearls on a string.

Whatever may happen or not happen, I choose to enjoy the day.

PETULANCE TRANSFORMED

     The thing that has the power to transform self-pity and discontent into something more palatable is gratitude. If we are feeling particularly petulant, we may whine that we have nothing at all to be grateful for. But that, of course, is ridiculous and untrue. If we start with a token item- our health, or the essential fact that we are alive at all... it can build from there. Or perhaps we have to be even more obvious with our stubborn selves. Are we grateful that we are not living in a dumpster, or under some bridge with rats crawling across our legs while we sleep? I'm grateful for that. And to have a car and a job and the ability to experience love.
     And I'm grateful for sunshine and night-time, and deep sleep. I'm grateful that I can see and hear; that I can touch and taste. I am grateful for friendship and laughter, for air conditioners when it's hot, and heat when it's cold. I'm grateful for flowers and thunderstorms and fruit. Gratitude builds on itself. One thing leads to another and another and before we know it, we are feeling better.
     I am grateful for gratitude! And for the knowledge that if I'm feeling pouty I don't have to stay there. I can count my blessings and express my thanks- and in so doing, I am transformed from misery to abundance, and petulance to joy!

I accept and acknowledge my blessings, and let the energy of gratitude wash over me like rain. 

BOUNDARIES

     Personal space is about more than physical distance. It's a necessary protection against the creeping energy of someone who is trying to wheedle inside of us like a weed with their energy and conversation. Meddlesome others pinch and suffocate us like vines. Their invasive questions thrust across our boundaries before we even realize that we need to shore up.
     To re-establish our borderline once it has been broken, we have to send out a bit of volley and gunshot warning to back the perpetrators off. We have to pause a moment to repair the damage. Like a dog who growls, we have to be clear with others when they are about to over-step. To invite them to tromp all over us as they please with their thoughts and opinions and questions is to become their toy. We lose our footing as they push at us, and we need to learn to stand our ground.
     Boundaries are necessary and respectable. We cannot hope for satisfaction in life if we recklessly disrespect the boundaries of others, or allow them to disrespect ours.

I understand and appreciate the importance of personal boundaries.