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Thursday, August 29, 2013

SELF IMPOSED DIFFICULTY


     Much of my difficulty in life is self-imposed. I have my share of challenge, but I add to it and add to it- always one to see how far I can go. I take on more than I have to. I drive myself with urgency and guilt. I am afraid of running out of time so I jam pack it with goals and chores and obligations, and then squeeze in my wants as afterthoughts.    
     I push and push and push, and I don't have to, not at the level I do. I choose to take on massive projects and lifetime dreams, and I choose these things without resting between one and the other. And a part of me feels self-congratulatory and proud- to be so productive and to be so motivated... and part of me feels like a fool.

I can live my dreams in moderation. I needn't take them on all at once.