THE OTHER SIDE OF JUDGMENT

      It bothers me sometimes that there are people out there who have made unwavering judgments about me that do not accurately reflect the truth of who I am. Some of these people I know, and some I do not. Among other things, I have been told that I am intimidating, incapable of healthy decision making, sickening with positivity, a liar, a bad person, a lousy friend, and a disappointment as a daughter. I do not believe any of these things to be true about myself in any kind of absolute way, but what does seem true is that sometimes other people have a plan in mind for me, something for me to do for them or be for them, and when I have followed my own path and spirit instead of their suggestive demands, they have been understandably displeased. In their displeasure, they judge me. They are frustrated that they cannot control me, feel hurt by my lack of interest in their vision for my life, and so, for them I become an awful person in some way, which is no doubt easier for them than having to consider their part in the dance.
     Being human and each of us struggling as we do with so many things, we rarely want to understand another person's point of view, and as a general rule, we are not particularly good listeners. It is less effort to make others wrong and attribute to them heartless characteristics and negative qualities than to ask questions and search for common ground, though the common ground does exist. We all have our gifts and our personal fears. We all have less than snow white motivations at times and the ability to harshly judge. We all do the judgment/conviction two-step, and some more than others. But all this determining judgment backfires. It makes for a world of suspicion and darkness and criticism, we live blocked from the soothing and sustaining warmth of love.
     Just for today, let's leave judgment alone. Let's not take on the judgment of others and feel resentful and misunderstood, and lets not slap our own opinions all over those who we encounter. Let's live today in a spirit of acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness. Just for today, let's live and let live.

I accept all those I encounter today with their human-ness, limitations, and imperfections that I may live free from resentment and experience compassion and forgiveness, and I accept myself in the same way.