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Friday, June 21, 2013

UNSOLICITED ADVICE

     Unsolicited advice is not particularly helpful. It's meant to be helpful, I suppose, but it feels more like judgment and attack; like I'm going about things all wrong and don't have the sense to understand that and re-direct my course without suggestions; like I don't even have the sense to ask for suggestions when I need them. Such advice feels passive aggressive to me, and condescending.
     So when we are tempted to be the ones doling it out, let's learn to hold our tongues. If someone wants our opinion or guidance, let's trust them to ask for it. I believe the exchange is meant to be a give and take, not a strong arm push of shoulds and more shoulds.

I refrain from assuming that someone wants my advice. I share my opinions with courtesy and care.