THE LIMITATIONS OF IMPOSING OUR WILL ON OTHERS

"You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."
~American Proverb ~

 

We cannot get what we want from people by imposing rules on them and by using negative, bullying tactics. We have all known coaches who yell at their players and induce guilt and shame in them expecting their anger to make a difference in the way they play, and on the scoreboard, and for the team's success. And it may do that, but not in the direction the coach intends.

     Negativity breeds negativity, and chastising people for their efforts discourages and depresses them. It does not make them want to do better and try harder. Trust does that, and guidance, and encouragement.
     If someone believes in us more than we believe in ourselves and trusts us to succeed, we somehow find reservoirs of untapped energy within and rise higher and stronger than we ever thought possible.
But if we are constantly being under-appreciated and told that we are not doing enough, that more is required, and more yet again... then we will lose our motivation and desire to do anything at all.

I motivate others by appreciating and acknowledging their unique gifts and talents. I refrain from harping and chastisement.