If I ask enough round about questions, the very thing I want might actually become the other person's idea. And then I can have it without responsibility, or guilt, and if it doesn't pan out for some reason, it was not my idea. But in the process of trying to get it without being direct, I am a limp and pathetic version of myself. I am scraping and small. I am looking to someone else to guess what I already know I need.
And if s/he does not guess? Then I am a victim, and I slink away feeling unheard and unloved. It's riduculous. Why don't I think it's ok to simply say what's on my mind and in my heart? Perhaps because it feels "selfish." I am supposed to be all about other people's needs and wants. But I don't know what other people need any more than they know what I need at any given moment... though I might flatter myself that I do. Life could be so much easier if we all just had the courage and the confidence to speak up.
I will not grasp and grab today. I will clearly ask for what I need.