INTERESTING EXERCISE

     No matter what kind of parents we have, we learn our gender roles from them. Unbeknownst to most of us, a deep-rooted belief system operates within us at all times. I have always had a sense about how I feel in regards to male and female rights and responsibilities, and an understanding of the way I accept it as being without even questioning it. But I didn't know the stark reality and the extent of my thoughts until I wrote them down on paper just the other day.
     At the top of a blank sheet I put the words "man" and "woman," and then proceeded to list what I believe about the roles and characteristics of each sex. And seeing what I wrote surprised and enlightened me. It explained so many of my feelings and potential resentments. It was a list taken directly from my youth- based on the way my mother and father behaved, and how they acted towards and around each other. Just because it's what I grew up with does not mean it has to be what I live with and die with.
     My list needs some definitive revision. I didn't even know I had one, and yet it plays out in my life every day. Now that I see it, I have the option to change my mind about what I believe. But I couldn't have seen it without writing it down: an invaluable exercise. I recommend it for everyone.

I take a moment to consider the beliefs I hold about gender roles, and I am willing to change my mind about my beliefs if they are sorrowfully out-dated.