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Friday, March 30, 2012

PARADOX

     People do not want to be beat up. They don't want to be put down, or lorded over, or made to feel small. They don't want to be bullied, disrespected, made fun of, or yelled at. No matter how wrong we may be, no one wants to be humiliated or discounted.
     We are all longing for approval, for recognition, for appreciation, and for permission to be who we are. We want to be loved. We want to be encouraged. We want to be thanked. Even if we don't admit it even to ourselves, we want these things. We might pretend that we need no one and we are just fine thank you, and we don't care a lick about what anyone thinks of us. But we all care a little. We can't help but care a little.
     Sideways and backwards we go about getting these things. We try to demand them, or bully others into giving them to us. Or else we become cynical, or hypochondiac and try to get what we need from a negative angle. The results of such attempts are checkered at best. The only legitimate way to receive love and appreciation is to give them to others. It's one of life's paradoxes. We get what we give. And what goes around definitely comes around. This has been my experience.
     When I want to feel loved I have to be loving. When I want to feel appreciated, I have to be appreciative. Like it or not, that's the way it works. So let's consider what we want and need emotionally and become willing to give it away.

I spread love and kindness because that's what I want to experience in my life.